The outskirts of the Jewish supermarket in France where one of the seiges, hostage takings, and killings occurred this past week — it rains there too, is cold and windy
Dear friends and readers,
This incident has been on my mind since it happened last week, and having seen Selma with Yvette yesterday I’m prompted to tell it.
Last Sunday Yvette and I were putting our groceries away in my car trunk outside our local supermarket. It was cold, windy, rainy. (We had a frigid week afterwards, today freezing rain so it’s dangerous to go out in a car.) An elderly black man obviously working for the supermarket came over to take our cart and put our shopping bags into the car if we needed help. His introductory phrase stays with me: “I don’t mean no harm to you.” It was spontaneously uttered.
How could he think we would assume he might mean harm to us. He had few teeth, was old, a raggedy-jacket, boots, clearly working out there because he needed the money. While we stood there for a second, cars were whizzing by. One of us said “Watch out!” — a car driven by someone carelessly, not paying proper attention (there are no lines in parking lots, no lights) was careening along. I remarked how dangerous parking lots are. The man agreed.
That man should not be out there working that way in the first place – he’s too old, and here he was saying to me, he didn’t mean me any harm. How could he possibly think I would assume that? How have we in the US come to this? Is it that if this was another state in the US where carrying concealed guns is permitted, she or I might have had a gun and he was afraid of us? More than a week ago now a foolish woman had a loaded gun in her purse while in a supermarket; her less than 2 year old riding in the cart, opened the purse, took out the gun and shot her dead. I was moved by Selma and by this weekend’s outpouring of (in effect) protest and standing together on behalf of liberty in France — as I saw it — against barbarity (even if their police did some of it). The French don’t murder each other daily the way US people do. No murders twice a week of minority dark-skinned people by the police. It’s no use talking about the NRA — how did they get to be so powerful; they must have backers among the US population wide enough.
Sylvia
Under the Sign of Sylvia II 
What a sad reflection on modern life that the poor fellow thought he had to introduce himself that way.
Clare
The pathos was more intense for me in that he was unself-conscious of the meaning of such a remark to us. I will say on our behalf since I began to talk to him, and Izzy too by the time we put the stuff in the car we wished each other a good day. So there was some decent human contact. What more could she and I do just then? Well now I’ve told the story.
I think you responded to the man in the only humane way you could. I am sure he’ll keep an eye out for you and Izzy in future. I thought the pathos was in his opening remark. The fact you had a brief conversation in a friendly manner would have reassured him of your lack of prejudiced fear.
Clare
Yes the pathos was that opening remark. He never was aware of what it indicated. I’ve watched all the French demonstrations and some were very moving. But the world leaders in a row showed a number of deeply barbaric people; numbers of them imprison and don’t mind when journalists are killed; and the whole truth of prejudices among the French (like all of us) shows this incident could ignite further conflict. The demonstrations did suggest that the majority of French people as a group want to be humane to one another and not live in fear of one another. I can’t say that’s true of the US.